By Tami Nguyen‑Tran – Ignis Ministries

There is something about the Third Station of the Cross that feels deeply personal.

Jesus falls for the first time.

Not at the end of the journey. Not when He is almost at Calvary. But near the beginning — when the weight of the cross first presses fully into His humanity.

And if I’m honest, it’s always the first fall that is the hardest.

We fall all the time. We fall physically. We fall emotionally. We fall at work, at home, in our relationships, in our vocation, in our faith. But it’s that first fall in a new season of life that shakes us. The first fall that makes us pause and question everything.

Is this the right path?

Did I mishear God?

Should I turn around?

Should I just stop?

The first fall introduces doubt in a way the later ones do not.

As a mom of a toddler, I have watched this unfold in the smallest and most tender ways. I remember when my daughter was learning to walk. She would wobble forward, so determined. Then she would fall. Every time she hit the ground, my heart dropped. My first instinct was to question myself.

Maybe I am pushing her too fast.

Maybe she isn’t ready.

Maybe I should just carry her longer.

But she would look up, frustrated but determined, and try again. And when she finally took her first steady steps, the joy erased the memory of every fall. Those falls were never proof she was not meant to walk. They were part of learning how.

Now I find myself in a different stage of life, experiencing a different kind of fall.

For almost two years, my husband and I prayed to grow our family. I remember the first negative pregnancy test. That first fall. The quiet heartbreak. The way hope can feel so fragile when it meets disappointment. Each month after felt heavy, but nothing stings quite like that first moment when expectation turns into emptiness.

By God’s grace, I am now carrying new life. And yet, I have realized something I did not expect:

Part of me still feels like I am on the ground from that first fall.

With my first pregnancy, anxiety barely crossed my mind. This time feels different. I am more aware. More cautious. More afraid. What if something goes wrong? What if we lose this? Sometimes it feels like I never fully got back up from that initial disappointment — like I am reliving the first fall over and over again.

It is hard to explain. The joy is real. The gratitude is real. But so is the fear.

When I meditate on Station III, I am reminded that Jesus knew this road would be hard. He knew the walk to Calvary would be brutal. He knew He would fall. And still, He began the journey.

His fall was not a sign that He was off mission. It was part of the mission.

He did not stay down. Not because it was easy. Not because the cross became lighter. But because love compelled Him forward.

And maybe that is the invitation for us this Lent:

To keep getting up.

Even when anxiety lingers. Even when the questions remain. Even when it feels like we are still in that first fall.

The destination matters. Resurrection always does. But the journey matters too. The falling matters. The rising matters. The mission continues in both.

As I navigate this season of motherhood, pregnancy, and the quiet battles in my mind, I pray for the grace to rise daily. To reset my thoughts. To trust that the weight I feel does not mean I am on the wrong path. To believe that fear does not have the final word.

Because we are one in Christ.

And united in mission.

And the mission does not end in the dust.

Lenten Reflections

Station 5: Simon Helps Jesus Carry His Cross

Station 4: Jesus Meets His Mother

Station 3: Jesus Falls the First Time

Station 1: Jesus Is Condemned to Death

Station 2: Jesus Carries His Cross